Neighborhood porches sport candle-lit Jacko’
lanterns along with store-purchased ghosts and skeletons which dangle from
hooks and sway in the evening breeze.
Television sitcoms, advantageously
scripted for the approaching holiday, celebrate the theme of Halloween.
The aroma of pumpkin
spice is seemingly ubiquitous and mocked even more so.
Yes, the accoutrements of
autumn attend to our spirit of celebration and festivity.
But let us not forget the
tradition of expertly launching a roll of toilet paper such that it decoratively
drapes upon tree limbs and other items upon a lawn while homeowners sleep or
pretend to do so.
Yes, some homeowners know
that it is coming and, perhaps having no other entertainment for the evening, inconspicuously
watch from a darkened room while sipping on pumpkin spice tea and quietly
playing Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”, chuckling as some launched rolls fail to
cooperate and thus fall with a thud upon the moist blades of grass.
Ah, to remember our teen
years when our preference for double ply was due to its tolerable quality of ductility.
The morning after such
act of tradition I drive by and, seeing the display of toilet paper hanging
from trees, I think…” There’s a bunch of unraveled mummies walking around nekid
out here somewhere!”.
And I hope that they are
smart enough to stay off the roads.
