Friday, October 21, 2022

In Anticipation of the Season of the Unraveled Mummy

 

 

   Neighborhood porches sport candle-lit Jacko’ lanterns along with store-purchased ghosts and skeletons which dangle from hooks and sway in the evening breeze.

Television sitcoms, advantageously scripted for the approaching holiday, celebrate the theme of Halloween.

The aroma of pumpkin spice is seemingly ubiquitous and mocked even more so.

Yes, the accoutrements of autumn attend to our spirit of celebration and festivity.

But let us not forget the tradition of expertly launching a roll of toilet paper such that it decoratively drapes upon tree limbs and other items upon a lawn while homeowners sleep or pretend to do so.

Yes, some homeowners know that it is coming and, perhaps having no other entertainment for the evening, inconspicuously watch from a darkened room while sipping on pumpkin spice tea and quietly playing Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”, chuckling as some launched rolls fail to cooperate and thus fall with a thud upon the moist blades of grass.

Ah, to remember our teen years when our preference for double ply was due to its tolerable quality of ductility.

The morning after such act of tradition I drive by and, seeing the display of toilet paper hanging from trees, I think…” There’s a bunch of unraveled mummies walking around nekid out here somewhere!”.

And I hope that they are smart enough to stay off the roads.